Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Whats the scariest invertebrate?

Now I know the internet says:
But I say:
The Kissing Bug. It sucks blood from thin-skinned areas, usually around the mouth. It poops on you and transmits a parasite. The parasite makes your mouth and/or eyes swell up. This kid doesn't have the herp, he got bit by an ugly bug that crapped on him. Now you say, so what, you have to tell people that you don't have a venereal disease for a week or two, well, that's not really the worst part. The worst part is that a decade or so down the line, the parasite is still in you and it's doing serious damage to your internal organs. It particularly damages the heart. You get weak and tired. You likely die of a heart attack. All because old stabby-face bit you and crapped on you. I know that claiming this one-inch bug is scarier than a two-foot long sea-beast is a bit abstract. Like, why don't I just say fleas are scary? Or malarial mosquitos? The Black Death and malaria have killed way more people, and more dramatically than Chagas. Well, I choose the kissing bug because I don't like extreme delays, and more directly, I really don't like any of the stabby-faced bugs. That includes you, assassin bug! Uugh.

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